{"id":93151,"date":"2025-04-08T02:57:00","date_gmt":"2025-04-08T02:57:00","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/neclink.com\/index.php\/2025\/04\/08\/how-to-be-a-neighborhood-aunt-teenage-version\/"},"modified":"2025-04-08T02:57:00","modified_gmt":"2025-04-08T02:57:00","slug":"how-to-be-a-neighborhood-aunt-teenage-version","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/neclink.com\/index.php\/2025\/04\/08\/how-to-be-a-neighborhood-aunt-teenage-version\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Be a Neighborhood Aunt, Teenage Version"},"content":{"rendered":"


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\"toby<\/p>\n

Last Monday, 14-year-old Toby<\/a> woke up in a bad mood. Dreading a long week of school, he thought about what might make him feel better. So, he sent a text\u2026<\/p>\n

\"toby<\/p>\n

\u201cHey, want to go to dinner tonight?\u201d he asked my friend Leah<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

For the past four years<\/em>, she, Toby, and her daughter, Sydney, have gone out to dinner once every season. They all love the ritual so much.<\/p>\n

\"toby<\/p>\n

Their very first dinner was in 2021, when I had Covid. \u201cHow can I help?\u201d Leah had texted me, earlier that day. I\u2019d told her that Anton was happy mucking around at home, but Toby was restless \u2014 he kept knocking on my bedroom door, lamenting that I couldn\u2019t let him in \u2014 so could she ever take him out for pizza? Within an hour, she was at our door.<\/p>\n

\"toby<\/p>\n

The evening went beautifully. Whenever Toby loves an activity, he immediately declares it \u201ca tradition,\u201d in hopes that it will happen again. And this time, it worked. Leah became his neighborhood aunt<\/a>.<\/p>\n

\"pasta<\/p>\n

\"toby<\/p>\n

The meal usually includes bread, pasta, Shirley Temples or ginger ale, and dessert. \u201cIt\u2019s called \u2018Auntie Rules,’\u201d Leah laughed. \u201cThe rule is, they can get whatever they want.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"\"<\/p>\n

\u201cAt first, we\u2019ll start off being silly,\u201d Leah told me. \u201cWe\u2019ll play Heads Up<\/a> or I Spy. But during the last 20 minutes or so, Toby usually starts asking questions and opening up, and then I\u2019ll hand my daughter my phone, so he and I can talk.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"toby<\/p>\n

Anton is always invited, but he likes to stay home for some quiet time. \u201cNow instead of trying to convince him to come, I bring him a treat,\u201d Leah told me. \u201cLike, s\u2019mores pizza or a yo-yo.\u201d<\/p>\n

\"toby<\/p>\n

I\u2019m enormously grateful that Toby and Anton have a trusted adult \u2014\u00a0outside the family \u2014 who roots for them and is always there for them. \u201cA relationship with a teenager is special,\u201d Leah<\/a> told me on the phone. \u201cOver the years, we have talked about your divorce<\/a>, his friends, girl stuff, school stuff, all kinds of things.\u201d She pauses, then adds, \u201cI envision this friendship for life.\u201d<\/p>\n

P.S. How to be a neighborhood aunt, baby version<\/a>, and 10 things I love about parenting teens\/preteens<\/a>.<\/p>\n

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44<\/span> COMMENTS<\/p>\n

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