{"id":84664,"date":"2024-09-16T21:07:13","date_gmt":"2024-09-16T21:07:13","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/neclink.com\/index.php\/2024\/09\/16\/how-to-make-home-a-haven\/"},"modified":"2024-09-16T21:07:13","modified_gmt":"2024-09-16T21:07:13","slug":"how-to-make-home-a-haven","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/neclink.com\/index.php\/2024\/09\/16\/how-to-make-home-a-haven\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Make Home a Haven"},"content":{"rendered":"


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Every few years, one of my kids will get a little weepy about school. \u201cThe days are sooooo long,\u201d they\u2019ll lament. \u201cWhy can\u2019t I just stay home for the morning?\u201d they might ask. Or, \u201cWhen does the holiday break start?\u201d<\/p>\n

During these phases, I\u2019m grateful to fall back on the advice that Jenny Rosenstrach shared<\/a> a decade ago. When her daughter was struggling socially in middle school, Jenny called her own mom and reported back:<\/p>\n

She told me what I already knew: I\u2019d have to sit this one out, as well as the next one and the one after that and the one after that, too. It was time to let the kids figure this stuff out on their own. But in a vehement tone that I imagine she reserves for her most unruly clients (she\u2019s a real estate attorney), Mom did give me one tangible way to help: \u201cYou just make sure that when those girls walk in that door every day,\u201d she said, \u201cthey never doubt that home is the most comforting place for them to be. That is what you can do.\u201d<\/em><\/p>\n

The most comforting place for them to be. And home often naturally is just that. But here are a few little extra things we\u2019ve done during tough times\u2026<\/p>\n

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Meet them after school with a cookie.<\/p>\n

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Take a little neighborhood walk and say hi to people you know.<\/p>\n

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Or literally stop to smell the flowers.<\/p>\n

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Do impersonations of each other. This one\u2019s ALWAYS a hit. (Here, Anton\u2019s pretending to be me: \u201cI\u2019m stressed from work! Look at these funny Instagrams, honey! Why doesn\u2019t anyone put their shoes away? This wine is organic. Kamala Harris!\u201d)<\/p>\n

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Throw a ball at a wall (any ball, any wall).<\/p>\n

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Invite neighborhood aunties<\/a> over.<\/p>\n

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Watch a favorite episode of Brooklyn Nine-Nine<\/a>.<\/p>\n

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Play a game (maybe Guess Who<\/a> or Tenzi<\/a>). <\/p>\n

And remember when a reader named Beth<\/a> presented her brilliant approach: \u201cWhen my kids have a bad day, we will make nachos<\/a> for dinner because today was \u2018Nacho Day\u2019\u2026 get it? There\u2019s something about talking about your bad day over salty, cheesy goodness that helps turn things around.\u201d<\/p>\n

What would you add? Reading books on the sofa? Listening to the Mamma Mia<\/a> soundtrack? Staying for extra bedtime cuddles? xoxo<\/strong><\/p>\n

P.S. How to help a stoic kid open up about feelings<\/a>, and four stages of parenting<\/a>.<\/p>\n

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